The Political Is Personal
This piece reflects on the profound personal impact of politics, particularly for women processing their own trauma.
Quick AI Summary:
The personal is political. This feminist tenet has been my guiding principle throughout my career of supporting women to realize and embody their inherent worth, strength, beauty, and power.
In the past few weeks since the re-election of Donald Trump, I am made very aware that the political is also personal.
In 2016 when Trump was first elected president, women started therapy with me specifically to process this event. Some women couldn’t get out of bed for days or weeks after the election. Other women experienced their minds racing with catastrophic fears, their bodies flooded with sensations of dread, and others became obsessed with preparing to survive the apocalypse. National politics infiltrated women’s minds and bodies in a way that I had never before witnessed.
Over the last eight years of processing the Trump administration in therapy sessions, I have discovered that, for many women, Trump personifies their history of trauma–and it is very personal.
Trump represents their unpredictable, chaotic family of origins that created chronic anxiety and hypervigilance around uncertainty.
He represents the men who continually interrupt to dominate the narrative.
He represents the boys and men who relentlessly sexually harassed them until their bodies felt shameful or only existed for men’s approval.
He represents the inequality in their marriages, with their invisible emotional and mental labor leaving them burnt out and depressed.
He represents getting passed over for a promotion by a less competent White man.
He represents their fear of being trapped by an unwanted pregnancy or dying from a wanted one.
He represents their childhood abuser who got away with it because they weren’t believed and subsequently silenced.
He represents their rapist that gaslit them into believing they were crazy for their feelings and perception.
He represents women’s conditional access to privilege and safety–given only if they are pleasing, palatable, and productive enough while wearing a smile for fear of being considered too loud, messy, fat, old, or crazy.
He represents the reality that all women know deep in our bones: that we can never feel truly safe and our rights can be taken away at any moment.
For many Wise Women, Trump is the archetypal bully who uses power and control to dominate, abuse, and destroy. When Donald Trump was re-elected this month, their core beliefs, forged in trauma, rose to the surface: “My voice doesn’t matter.” “I’m not enough.” “I am not safe.” “I’m helpless.” “I’m trapped with no escape.” “I’m powerless to protect myself.” These maladaptive core beliefs flood the mind and body and create distress.
So, if you are noticing that your body has been over activated, if you are struggling to feel hopeful, or if you are avoiding anything and everything related to Donald Trump, ask yourself if you are in the throes of a trauma response.
If the answer is yes, follow the Wise Women’s Wisdom. If the answer is no, please check in with your fellow Wise Woman. No matter what your political affiliation, being a woman in America involves trauma, and you are worthy of care and healing.
Wise Women’s Wisdom
Name it to frame it. Often when we can name and thus understand that our past trauma is being triggered, it can calm the intensity of our emotional response. This also allows us to shift our expectations and start caring for ourselves.
Find safety within. Work to separate from the past and future in your mind by bringing your awareness to the present. Remind yourself that you are safe in this moment (see download).
Seek support. You are not alone. Talk with other Wise Women or call a trauma-informed mental health provider to help you process your past experiences.
Directions:
- Take a couple deep belly breaths.
- Bring your awareness to the present moment by looking at the image of safety.
- Read the affirmation and breathe it in.
- Color the sheet for one song to help your mind find safety within.
- Repeat as desired.
I've been obsessed with the book When Women Were Dragons by Kelly Barnhill. It's a retelling of the 1950's America when thousands of women unexpectedly turned into dragons and freed themselves from whatever was holding them down. It's a fun escape with a powerful message about women owning their power. Highly recommend.
The book is available on Audible and wherever you get your books.
