It’s Time to Stand Up. It’s Time to Move!

So much feels out of our control right now. It’s a natural human response to trauma to do nothing, to freeze in our helplessness and wait for the threat to pass. 

When Wise Women in my office get stuck in "freeze," I encourage them to make the smallest movement—like wiggling a finger or shifting from sitting to standing. This helps shift the mind out of its trauma response.

It’s time to move. To do something, anything. It’s time to stand up!

We can’t fix everything. As one person, there are real limits to our time, energy, and resources. But you can take action.

Start with one teeny, tiny baby step toward your WISE-ASS Way intention. We call these “empowering micro-decisions.”

On a national level, it might mean donating to a cause you're passionate about.

Locally, it could be emailing a representative or voting. (Today is voting day in STL!)

On a personal level, it might be practicing your breath-work, doing a single yoga pose, or coloring an affirmation for 5 minutes.

Success begets success!

This edition of Inside Wise Women’s Wisdom offers therapeutic wisdom, skills, and tools to help you take action through the “I” for Incremental in the WISE-ASS Woman’s Way. Plus, you’ll find a free, downloadable tracker for your empowering micro-decisions.

Inside This Edition

• Empowering Quote & Image
• The "I" of the WISE-ASS Woman's Way (video)
• WW Playlist Recommendation
• Experiential: Nurturing Baby Steps
• Psycho-education on Incremental Steps
• Wise Women’s Wisdom
• DOWNLOAD: Track Your Empowering Micro-Decisions
• WW Book Recommendation
• Call to Action

We’ve been working to identify our needs and set an intention aligned with our authentic inner wisdom. That was the “what” of our WISE-ASS Woman’s Way.

In the last edition, we paved our path by clarifying the reasons for walking it, boosting and sustaining our motivation. This was the “why” of our WISE-ASS Woman’s Way.

In this edition, we focus on the “how” of our WISE-ASS Woman’s Way. You’ll learn how to turn your intention into action, creating nurturing baby steps that allow you to intuitively and realistically walk your path toward your wisest, most empowered self.

Created in community with Wise Women, A Space for Wise Women playlists support women to explore an emotional state or shift to a new one through the healing power of music.

Experiencing concepts through our hands, senses, and emotions allows us to go beyond simply understanding the ideas in our minds—it integrates the learning deep into our bodies. An experiential provides a kind of “knowing” that isn’t just intellectual; instead, it’s a “knowing” that becomes integrated into our minds, bodies, and entire selves. This is an "experiential."

Nurturing Baby Steps

Purpose

• To operationalize your intention within the WISE-ASS Woman’s Way.
• To learn how to create weekly baby steps that are realistic for your energy, time, mood, and responsibilities.
• To acknowledge and celebrate your nurturing baby steps along the way.

Supplies

• Paper
• Pen
• AS4WW playlist

Step 1: Review the "I" of the WISE-ASS Woman's Way

What is one small step you can take this week to care for yourself?

Wise Women can struggle with this one because they often feel their small step isn't "good enough." If starting a meditation practice, 30 minutes a day is not realistic. Instead, try 30 seconds of intentional breathing once this week. Seriously, it has to start this small. Break down your weekly steps into even tinier baby steps because this is how Wise Women create sustainable, integrated change. Success begets success

Step 2: Miracle Question (6min)

The miracle question is from the solutions-focused approach, which is a strength-based, goal-directed approach to change that is aligned with the WISE-ASS Woman's Way.

Accepting our current reality and laws of physics, consider the following question and journal for 6 minutes:

Step 3: Circle what you can control (1 min)

Review your journal writing from the miracle question to identify words or phrases that represent what you can control.

Circle these to increase your awareness of how you'll begin to operationalize your intention.

Step 4: Begin operationalizing your intention (1 song)

Pick a song from the recommended AS4WW playlist, move your body to the rhythm, and then brainstorm a list of the changes you'd need to make to turn this miracle into a reality.

WW Examples

• Advocate for a cause
• Practice saying no!
• Set boundaries
• Practice resting
• Learn to identify your needs
• Set internal, loving limits
• Learn to break avoidance
• Get 8-10 hours of sleep
• Learn emotional regulation skills
• Figure out technology to help with executive functioning struggles
• Practice self-compassion, self-acceptance, & unconditional self-worth

Education on Incremental Steps

Your empowering micro-decisions can target changes in your behaviors, thoughts, feelings, or relationships.

Review these WW practices to give you ideas for creating effective, incremental steps along your WISE-ASS Woman's Way path.

WW Practices to Transform Your Behaviors:

WW Practices to Transform Your Thoughts:

WW Practices to Transform Your Feelings:

WW Practices to Transform Your Relationships:

Moving from Big to Baby Steps

1. Take one week at a time

• Each week, ask yourself, “What’s one way I can take care of myself this week?” 
• The key to the WISE-ASS Woman’s Way is to set your steps one week at a time because our lives are complex, constantly evolving, and full of changing responsibilities.

2. Break it down into the teeniest, tiniest step.

• Now, break it down even further—seriously!
• If you don’t feel like you have the energy to complete your baby step, you haven’t broken it down far enough.
• Consider using “1 time this week” or “for 1 minute.” You can always do more, and then you’ll feel amazing, which will lead to more motivation to continue on your path.

3. Use positive, proactive language

• Use phrases like “I will” or “I can” rather than “I won’t” or “I can’t.”

4. Focus on presence rather than absence

• Concentrate on the presence of something (what you will do) rather than absence (what you won’t do) is more motivating.

5. Be realistic

• Make sure the step is realistic for your current life—not what was realistic when you were 20 or in a different stage of life.
• Simply ask yourself, “Is this baby step realistic for me right now, based on my energy, time, life stage, responsibilities, body condition, hormones, and mood?” If the answer is “no,” adjust the step or change it completely.

6. Give yourself options

• If your step is “movement for 5 minutes,” give yourself options like walking, stretching, yoga, or dancing based on your energy level.
• For a mindfulness practice, try the 5-4-3-2-1 technique, a mantra like “I’m in this moment,” or 30 seconds of intentional breathing.

7. Expect setbacks

• Accept that “failures” and setbacks are a normal part of the process.
• Shift your thoughts to viewing them as opportunities to identify obstacles holding you back from the life you deserve. (We’ll focus on overcoming obstacles in the “E” for Evolve of the WISE-ASS Woman’s Way.)

8. Remember, change is hard.

• Just because it’s tough doesn’t mean you’re doing it wrong. Transforming your habits takes hard work. These deeply rooted patterns didn’t form overnight—they’ve likely taken years or decades to create.
• Be patient with yourself and trust that consistent, incremental baby steps lead to lasting transformation.

9. Believe, you are worth it!

• Always remind yourself that your body and mind deserve exceptional care, and you are the only one who can provide it!

Wise Women often reference Atomic Habits by James Clear when exploring the “I” of the WISE-ASS Woman’s Way. While not all concepts align perfectly with the WISE-ASS Woman’s Way, the book offers valuable insights into the power of small, consistent changes for lasting transformation. It challenges the traditional idea of willpower, showing how environment and systems play a crucial role in creating lasting change. By taking control of small habits, WW can build confidence, break free from societal expectations, and create the empowered life they deserve. It's worth exploring wherever you buy or listen to your books.

1. Track Your Empowering Micro-Decisions

Download this monthly tracker to maintain motivation and accountability.

2. Share Your Empowering Micro-Decisions

Share your plan in the community space to hold yourself accountable, receive support, and inspire others. Writing down and sharing your plan shows your commitment to yourself and increases the likelihood of following through.

3. Join us as a Wise Woman Insider

If you haven't yet become a WW Insider, I invite you to consider supporting our collective work by becoming a paid member. As a WW Insider, you'll gain access to a supportive space protected from misogynistic trolls, along with exclusive content, videos, experiences, downloads, and monthly LIVE online Wise Women gatherings—plus much more.

If the $5 membership fee is a concern, please reach out—I'm happy to discuss options so you can still dive deeper with us.

Curious Wise Women with a free membership will continue to receive bite-sized wisdom, therapeutic tools, and expressive experiences supporting women in embodying our wisest, most empowered selves delivered directly to your inbox.

For more about Inside Wise Women's Wisdom, click here.

This article is open to the public, and all parts may be shared freely to support and empower women.

Share your thoughts, feelings, and feedback on this piece below. Let's start a conversation.

Take exceptional care of yourself,

Sarah F. Coffman, MSW, LCSW

A Space for Wise Women

Web: aspaceforwisewomen.com
FB: Sarah Coffman
FB: A Space for Wise Woman
IG: @a.space.for.wise.women